"Do you really have to ask?" Or "Are you really considering it?"

Okay, so let's say it's lunch time and you bring something that requires salad dressing but you didn't bring any. After rummaging through the office mini-fridge, you find some salad dressing. At this point, the story differs on whether it had already been opened or not. But I really don't think it matters either way.

So Velma comes to me and said, "If this salad dressing hasn't been opened yet, but it says best flavor by April 26, 2006, would you still eat it?"

APRIL 24, 2006 Seriously? Seriously?

After secretly conferring with my office mates (none of whom would have considered eating it), there is some debate on whether or not it had already been opened. But does it really matter? I think the answer should be "Of course I would NOT eat it!"

So that was yesterday and she's still alive and kicking and I haven't heard any stories of becoming violently ill last night. But it's just disgusting! Think of the ingrediants in salad dressing...oil, egg, I don't know what else but lots of stuff that can go completely rancid! I really don't care if it's been factory sealed or previously frozen: YOU DON'T EAT ANYTHING THAT EXPIRED OVER 3 YEARS AGO. EVER.

So Velma has eaten some other gross things and sometimes she eats things that aren't gross but become gross because of how she eats it.

For example: She eats most things with her hands. But it's the way she holds it.

Hard-Boiled Egg: She holds like a 3-year-old would hold an ice cream cone.. Is that really necessary?

Oscar Meyer Overly-Processed Sandwich Ham: Again, she holds like a 3-year-old would hold an ice cream cone. So you know that cheap lunch meat, particularly ham, that has all that weird slimy gelatinous stuff on it? Now imagine rolling it up and holding it tightly in your fist. It is the most disgusting thing to witness.

She basically just chows down out of her hand that is tightly gripping any type of food product.